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Welcome to Gary's cool & Very Typical Bar!
Fourteen pages and still more to read! Well, this page is basically an on-line bar for all you 'boozy' beer blokes including my slob of a brother! Hear all the latest goings' on in the outside world and stuff to keep to happy when you are bored out of your brain! This page simply discusses all the latest at your local bar, "Gary's Bar!".
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Lastest on the 'Fiitest' Women!
Well, there is a lot to report here. All the dirty old gits (including me) will absolutely love this column. So, who is being discussed at Gary's Bar presently:
1) "Wow, Cat Deeley (pikkied) is extramly fit isn't she! She must be da fittest bird on tele! (Check out her official & dedicated sites for people's comments if you don't believe me)."
2) Tamzin Outhwaite (Melanie Healy) is rumered to be returning to the square, back to Ian, of all the blokes she has had! She deserves a bloke like me, someone who she can love dearly (emphasise 'love')!"
3) "Have you seen Neighbour's recently? That Holly Valance ('Plays Falicity Skully) is a bit of alright, eh? Only 17 too!"
4) Angelina Jolie, Tomb Raider, 'nuff said! Well, four more words, gun straps around thighs! |
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Powerfull Drinks!
Are you weak with the booze, or can you drink till you drop? These images of what my customers see of one my unsuspecting locals after the following drinks:
-Tripple Vodka-Martini
-pint of JD
-Loads of special brew
-Gary's special new larger!
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BOB's faviorate pub!
BOB can now confirm that he has two amazing local pubs! One is 'Da Knot', Down Da Wessie, and the other is this very online bar. Now, whatever BOB likes is the most coolest and fashonable thing at the moment, so I am doing something right at least! He 'logs' onto my bar nightly, to get the latest information! |
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The Boozers' 'Landlord Of The Year' 2001
Well, this award is also decided by me, as I my general knowledge is normally good. Well, no time to waste! Last year's landlord of the year was Graham Reynolds who is the landlord for The Slaughtered Hamster in Western-Super-Mare. There were several reasons why he won. His pub was open from 10am and every hour was happy hour! Almost every night he held those world famous lock-ins and let his drunken customers spend the night in his bar if they were too drunk for their wives! Live entertainment was also held twice a week and he made his own powerful 'home-brew'!
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Celebrity visits at Gary's Bar!
Now this is cool! So far, I have had several famous guests at Gary's Bar! Of course, Cat Deeley has visited and snogged me twise (very good indeed). All the Crossroads veterains from the old one on the new one have popped in and so has Lenny Henry! I have also recieved confirmation that Martin Kemp and Steve McFadden are coming shortly! This should be fun - Da well 'ard Kid, BOB, Martin and Steve in the same pub! I am also trying to contact Eastenders babe Tamzin Outhwaite and the dynamic duo that is Ant & Dec! |
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Annoying barred member of my bar
This person (coloured out for his own safety) has already been barred from this on-line bar! He finds it funny to pick fun at me (like a lot of people do), but this one simply goes too far. Firstly, it was a simple punch from me. Then it was a friendly headbutt from BOB, then a more serious fight with BOB and Sid and now if he stepps into this bar again, he gets the death penalty from BOB. As you can probably tell, he now keeps well away, but glances in to see if BOB is there! As BOb is here most times, this bloke continues past rather hurridly!
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Gary's River Of Beer!
This is the view from the back of my cool bar! It is not a plain, boring-looking canal thingy. This is a stram of booze, a river of beer! Lots of people have drank from here and these people are currently lying at the bottom, oh dear! Barney from 'The Simpsons' has also been spotted drinking from here! At the rate he drinks, this canal will be gone by this time next year! |
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