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Welcome to what is possibly the best page on this site!
Well, you have discovered The amazing Leggacy of BOB! This page was coming anyway, but by popular demand, it is here now! It is also now complete, so take a look at the 'ardest bloke in the north west!
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A brief history of BOB.
BOB was born in 1964 and is one of the true original Port 'eads! He became bald after his first fight at the age of 12 (1976). BOB was under-estimated for a few years even though he had never lost a fight! He became 'Da Port's 'ardest in 1980, after climbing the table (from 20,000) for four long years! BOB has never lost a fight and never been below number one since 1980! BOB's first encounter with Liverpool rival Krud in 1983, and this was his real test to prove his worth! BOB has encountered Krud several times since. Most recent being from 05/02/2001 to 10/02/2001. BOB became da 'ardest in the north-west that same year (1983). BOB then went onto win an award for the longest standing top 'ard person in 1988. In 1991 Da well 'ard Kid! came along and has challenged BOB many times. In 1996 BOB butted down a warehouse (a first for any 'ard geezer!). Then in 1998, BOB and Da well 'ard Kid became friends and have been the elete of the 'ardness table ever since. BOB just gets 'arder! |
BOB's long lost family!
Hard to imagine, but BOB did once have a family. His parents died in 1992 when a bus hit them. BOB also had a brother, COB. He was also a fighter and became the 'ardest in Manchester (when he moved there in 1990). He lasted 3 years in top spot, but deteriated and finally dropped out of the top 10 in 1995. He was sooooooo embarased over this, that he killed himself, because of the sheer embarasement! BOB's grandparents and all other relatives are unknown. |
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How BOB became so incredibly 'ard!
This has always been a question that is difficult to imagine. BOB's parents were fond of all the fighting sports, and BOB always watched them and practised daily. He gradually grew in strengh. How he got his headbutting techniques is a different story!! One day krud 'ad off with his hands. As he is not a faggit, he said"oooohhhhh!" and used his head for several months. He sewed his hands back on and now uses both (but prefers his headbutting - he says it is funnier!). |
BOB's friends!
Until the early 90's, BOB didn't really have any friends! People were too scared of his sheer strengh and thought they might get a jolly good butting from him! BOB's first true friend was firearms expert, Sid! No one knows how these two became friends, nor does anyone knows why he became friends with the rest! His other friends are basically are the ones listed in da 'ardness table. His best friends are Sid and Da well 'ard Kid!. Recently, BOB has become friends with seed 15,000 Paul Young. BOB was quite impressed in his dodging skills! Although this relationship is not terribly strong!
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BOB's worst ever fights!
BOB has never had a really bad match. As you already know, BOB has never lost a battle, not even a friendly! His worst fight came in 1979, the year before he gained his usual top spot. BOB nearly lost the fight as his fightee (will remain nameless - simply because BOB killed him the day later!!!) was cheating quite a lot! BOB (then still quite new to the game) didn't really know any methods to get him back. But is dug in and came out a very, very close winner! BOB's fights with Krud are also long and hard, and BOB has never came out a clear winner!
Last week, BOB bought a rather dodgy, rusty new friend, a potato chipping machine! I know you can see the picture right now! Just in these last seven days, BOB has potato-chipped no less than 23 Port 'ead victims! If he gets wound up by any punk, particuarly the rough 'eads from "Down Stanney", he simply waits until they are in position alongside the machine then butts them into the machine, which chips the body up and they come out the other end in a metal bucket resembling a thick, blobby steamy tomato soup! |
BOB's best ever fights!
BOB's best fights are fighting his close rivals in the top 10 and people in and around the foot of the table! Fighting with scouse rival Krud (in the north west tables) are always challenging and competitive, although quite hard. He also enjoys fighting Da well 'ard Kid! (as he is a close friend). BOB also likes fighting Colin Day, he finds the matches soooo easy he could beat him without using his hands or his polished head!
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Popular Q's & A's
1)How did you get that big polished skin 'ead?
Well, I simply polish it with furnature polish every 12 hours!
2)How can you grin the way you do?
Just grin, really strech them muscles, if you have any HAHAHAHAHA!
3)How long 'ave you 'ad that brown leather jacket?
Not long, only 20 or so years! It is naturally distressed, not all this new poncy stuff! |
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